POOR WILLIAM’S WHIMS: I Am a Gonna Do It! Bullshit! By POOR WILLIAM →VIDEO INCLUDED← The other late evening began with Poor William laughing at “his ownself.” Him all knowing he was full of what Coach Artie Nute called “bullmalarkey.” Now, he does not bullshit to actually con folks into thinking something contrary to […]
The Green Zebra
July 7, 2011 2 Comments
Poor William’s Whims: The Green Zebra By POOR WILLIAM Damn, is Poor William dropping acid or what? A green zebra, you gotta be kidding? No, PW is not dropping acid, nor has he lost the last vestige of sense he has, which ain’t much. A green zebra is an Heirloom tomato. The […]
My Garden Mistress
June 2, 2011 7 Comments
Poor William’s Whims My Garden Mistress By POOR WILLIAM Jeez, there goes Poor William again with some off-the-wall stuff. What say ye Poor William, you have a mistress? Yes, and I feel shame everyday as I fondle rosemary, rub my tomatoes, stroke my burpless cucumber, bend my banana pepper, and love on an […]
This Mans Army and the Tainted Tattoo
May 5, 2011 9 Comments
POOR WILLIAM’S WHIMS This Man’s Army and the Tainted Tattoo By POOR WILLIAM What say ye Poor William, a tainted tattoo? What do you mean, kind sir? The power of the “almost permanent” can have long-term ramifications. New Year’s Day 1983 was the day Poor William decided to permanently mark his then thin frame. […]
Guess What Goes With Vodka?
April 21, 2011 8 Comments
POOR WILLIAM’S WHIMS & YOU CAN’T GET THIS S*@$ IN NEW YORK CITY: Guess what goes with Vodka? By POOR WILLIAM (VIDEO INCLUDED) “I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade…And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.” — Ron White Vodka […]
Some Dogs Got to be Walked!?!
April 14, 2011 8 Comments
By POOR WILLIAM Poor, Poor William has been insanely busy with his three jobs as of late and preparing for the awesome 8th Annual Clarksdale Juke Joint Festival being held right here in Sunflower River City. As a result, he has been behind the curve writing the last two weeks and is forced to amend […]
Poor William’s Mind is a Terrible Thing to Follow
April 7, 2011 12 Comments
POOR WILLIAM’S WHIMS: Poor William’s Mind is a Terrible Thing to Follow By POOR WILLIAM Poor William’s Mind is a Terrible Thing to Follow: Part of the problem with being Poor William is that he seriously lacks focus. He begins with incredible focus, but is easily distracted down little known and seldom valued “bunny trails.” […]
Hey, Bruh, Lend Me a Dime
March 10, 2011 1 Comment
(Clarksdale, Mississippi) By POOR WILLIAM “Hey, Bruh, lend me a dime?” This was verbatim what Poor William was asked, or was it told, on his way to Delta State last year. He had stopped to purchase gas for his bumper-sticker-encumbered Jeep, when out of the corner of his eagle eye, what should appear but a […]
Toomer’s Corner Makes the South the South
February 17, 2011 2 Comments
POOR WILLIAM’S WHIMS: Toomer’s Corner Makes the South the South By POOR WILLIAM Today’s headline news in the Clarion Ledger from the Associated Press: “Auburn: Oak trees poisoned at Toomer’s Corner.” The aged oak trees are on the site where Auburn fans have long celebrated big wins. Ain’t that ‘bout a bitch? It’s […]
I’ve Missed the Gym
February 10, 2011 11 Comments
By POOR WILLIAM CLARKSDALE, Mississippi NOTE: The reason Poor William and Pontificus both love to refer to themselves in the third person is because many politicians and preachers do it all the time, and the two boys want to share in the awesome sense of grandeur the third person spoken in the first person provides […]
If a Little is Good, Then…
February 3, 2011 5 Comments
By POOR WILLIAM Never to be one to limit his fine self to one of anything, Poor William likely has arrived at the core of many of his intemperate Bohemian tendencies. It is rooted deeply in the Southern male psyche: If a little is good, then a lot is better! This gluttonous mindset will be […]
The Beaver Patrol
January 27, 2011 3 Comments
By Poor William (Clarksdale, Mississippi) Prior to the Christmas season, early this past December, Poor William and his lovely bride were invited to attend a celebration honoring a man who has done wonderful things in our community for decades, and done so selflessly and with little fanfare–a true philanthropist. It was a lovely event held […]
A Mississippi Delta Christmas
December 30, 2010 10 Comments
By POOR WILLIAM (Clarksdale, Mississippi) VIDEO IN POST A story about a Mississippi Delta Christmas. In Poor William’s ‘umble estimation, The Mississippi Delta hosts no finer Christmas night party than the one shared for 45 years by the Howells, Johnsons, and Connells. It includes hot Southern delicacies such as rare beef tender, lovingly stuffed twice-baked […]
Played by the Blues
December 23, 2010 2 Comments
By Poor William (Clarksdale, Mississippi) VIDEO IN POST NOTE TO READER: Pontificus Minimus started writing this article as a result of being severely affected by his yearly holiday case of the blues. It began as more of a “Poor is me, but shame on me” lament written by a lad seasoned in depression and in […]
Dawg at the Right House
November 29, 2010 5 Comments
By POOR WILLIAM CLARKSDALE, Mississippi Poor William has taken a lengthy hiatus from “whiming.” What a crying-ass shame, not because his whims are manna-like sustenance for weary, famished readers; nay, let it not be thought so! Poor William just needs to write for his own unmitigated sanity.Now he will share precisely why he is the proverbial […]
More about Poor William’s Whims
November 6, 2010 Leave a Comment
POOR WILLIAM’S WHIMS (and yes, I am referring to myself in the third person here as do many preachers and politicians, but I do so with much irony and a sardonic grin on my face) seeks to share interesting quotes, funny thoughts and gestures, vocabulary words—not always defined (in the hope that the reader will […]
Advent of a whim
June 2, 2010 Leave a Comment
By Poor William (Clarksdale, Mississippi) The creation of a written whim is an unusual process. Poor William has never taken a journalism class and possesses little experience writing beyond laboring over a plethora of college papers. Consequently, it has been necessary for him to find his “voice” without the assistance of formal training. I think […]
2011: A Snow Odyssey Comments
THE DELTA BOHEMIAN, POOR WILLIAM, AND HIS TRYING-TO-EXPLAIN BROTHER, PONTIFICUS MINIMUS, ALL RECEIVED MANY COMMENTS, KUDDOS AND A FEW ECCLESIASTICAL ADMONISHMENTS! MAGICAL MADGE AND I HAVE POSTED MOST OF THEM BELOW. THEY CAME LARGELY FROM FACEBOOK, THE DELTA BOHEMIAN WEBSITE, AND ORAL COMMENTARY. READ IF YOU MUST; ENJOY IF YOU WILL: MJH: Bill, What inspired […]