YAK vs JONES – A Mississippi Delta Throw Down

YOU CAN’T GET THIS S*@$ IN NEW YORK CITY

A serendipitous late-afternoon Mississippi Delta Throw Down occurred last week outside Snap Fitness. Poor William was inside wearing all the rough off the weight machines, when he heard a bit of smack talking on the chest press machine to his left.

The crew–Clarksdale Police Department Cpl. Joseph Wide (YAK), “T” Walker, Tremayne Kimmons, William Jones, and Lee Jackson were all lifting ALL the weight on the chest press machine. It made Poor William sick to watch these guys with “guns” the size of towboat cables lifting every damn weight in the place–all at once. And, they did it while laughing and hardly even breathing.

The crew works out most late afternoons, and they always have a good time bantering with one another. On this day, Poor William wanted to document the results of the smack talking for posterity sake.

YAK and Jones decided to head to the parking lot to have a footrace–head-to-head and mano-a-mano. How in the world could guys with biceps and chests this big actually sprint across the parking lot? The simple laws of gravity require their pistons (legs) to overcome the excessive gravitational pull caused by the shear amount of muscle their upper torsos were toting.

Poor William only had his iPhone with him, but document he did. The race began and ended with a flash. YAK beat Jones to the finish line for some parking lot bragging rights. A good time was had by participants and referees alike.

All Poor William could think as he saw these extraordinary specimens of physical ingenuity sprint across the parking lot at unheard of speeds for guys their size was, “Damn I am glad I am not a cornerback trying to stop an end run!”

To the crew: Vaya con Dios, and may the wind always be at your back and may Poor William always be friends “wit y’all” on fight day!

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