Water Matters

By PONTINFUS MINIMUS PHOTOGRAPHS OF THE MISSISSIPPI RIVER FLOOD OF 2011 THAT ARE TAKEN ON THE FLOODWATERS (TAKEN BY DRIFTWOOD JOHNNIE – aka JOHN RUSKEY of QUAPAW CANOE COMPANY) AND FROM AN AIRCRAFT (TAKEN BY POOR WILLIAM) ARE IN THIS POST Water is presently occupying the thoughts of much of the world’s population, and for […]

Highwater’s Rising Report from Driftwood Johnnie

By DRIFTWOOD JOHNNIE Y’all, its happening, this is exactly what the US Army Corps of Engineers has created the greatest levee system in the world to protect us from — they call it “Project Flood” — next week we will see the highest waters in the Lower Mississippi Valley since the record-breaking high water of 1937. […]

Delta Bohemian’s MR. MARCH 2011

Mr. Lil John fell in to the Tallahatchie River and shortly thereafter, Mr. March was born! The Delta Bohemian’s MR. MARCH 2011  →VIDEO AND PHOTOS INCLUDED← Ding, Ding, school was out this past Monday for Clarksdale teacher and local artist Joey Young, who accompanied the following Delta Bohemians: Mr. Lil John McKee, also known as Fat […]

I Ain’t Even Looking at that Sign

I Ain’t Even Looking at that Sign By FAT CLYDE   Clarksvegas – a moniker by which the Mississippi Delta town of Clarksdale is known, indicating its strong propensity for gambling. Of the many vices for which the Delta is known (relative to our more pious neighbors in the hills to the east), gambling ranks […]

Sunflower River Expedition: Take a journey with us

With John Ruskey and friends A Sunflower River Expedition! An excerpt taken from John Ruskey’s update Keith Plunkett — Lucy’s Revenge: 2 Days on a Sunflower River Expedition  “We hosted Keith & Sharon Plunkett and their son Hudson on the Sunflower last weekend — 11 paddlers on the river Saturday, 13 paddlers on Sunday, including […]

Mamas, Do Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Plowboys

By LIL JOHN MCKEE CLARKSDALE, Mississippi He was fastidiously arranged; his tailored Italian suit was nearly as shiny as his $1,000 Ferragamos. Like his jacket, his coiffed mane appeared a bit too grand for his diminutive frame. His limp-noodle handshake had left me with a slight sensation of hand lotion on my palm. He leered […]

Herons & Otters: February is “Sunflower River Month”

By DRIFTWOOD JOHNNIE Sat, Feb 19th @ 12noon — Meeting for Friends of the Sunflower River  — Open to the public — at Quapaw Canoe Company — Street level 3rd & Sunflower Avenue in downtown Clarksdale Great Blue Heron On a recent February Delta Day as I was walking along the banks of the Sunflower […]

But isn’t it Dirty? No, it’s the Sunflower!

By DRIFTWOOD JOHNNIE (John Ruskey is a contributing writer to The Delta Bohemian) Sat, Feb 19th @ 12 noon — Meeting for Friends of the Sunflower River — at Quapaw Canoe Company — Street level 3rd & Sunflower Ave. Y’all its that time of year: February is Sunflower River Month!  If you’ve never before participated […]

Dingus Goes To Jail

By DINGUS BATTICUS (Clarksdale, Mississippi) Hell yeah I’ve been drinking. Three solid weeks in the slammer and nary a sniff, even of mouthwash! When I left that jailhouse earlier today, I told those folks, “Y’all have done seen the last of Dingus Batic-ASS!” I reckon the real question is whether or not I learned my […]

A picture is worth a thousand words

By Lil John McKee This week I want to demonstrate the theory that a picture is worth a thousand words. The following charts are courtesy of the Earth Policy Institute. They tell their own story about agriculture.

Lack of Student Empathy

By HUCKLEBERRY ED (Clarksdale, Mississippi) Huckleberry Ed heard a story last week from a young, idealistic, but-not-naïve teacher (we will call him Mr. Chips) in the public school system. His story rang as true as an old Big Ben alarm clock. Huckleberry Ed saw it in the public schools on a daily basis, and it […]

Huckleberry Ed’s Educational Platform & Philosophy

CLARKSDALE, Mississippi Educational Aims and Purpose of Schooling The most important aim of education for America’s children is to provide a rigorous, liberal education for all children, regardless of socio-economic status or abilities.  A liberal education is an education that develops the mind and includes exposure to an array of Core and Humanities-centered classes. Children […]

Water Wars – Will They Make it to the Mississippi Delta?

  (Clarksdale, Mississippi) By LIL JOHN MCKEE EDITORS NOTE: John McKee is a representative from Coahoma County to the Yazoo Mississippi Delta Joint Water Management District (YMD). This thesis, including problem statement, analysis and conclusions are evident of doctoral level research.         In agricultural circles around the world, the Mississippi Delta is […]

A Nice Gentleman

(Clarksdale, Mississippi) EDITORS NOTE: The views expressed by Dingus Batticus do not reflect the opinions and beliefs of the Delta Bohemian. Dingus is a developing character who is reminiscent of Archie Bunker: a complex character with overt racist views, which will likely be mitigated over time. Dingus gives a portrayal into an element living in […]

Delta Dirt: Sand, Clay, and a River’s Love

By Lil John McKee (Clarksdale, Mississippi) Billy Howell, the Blogging Bohemian and editor-in-chief of www.deltabohemain.com, happens to be the writer’s best and oldest friend, which should indicate to the reader one of two possibilities: Howell is letting an otherwise untrained and incompetent writer drivel on about farming (the most searched-for word on all of Google, […]

Precisely!

By Lil John McKee Guest Bohemian (Clarksdale, Mississippi) Precisely. Following is an excerpt from an interview done last fall in the Clarksdale Press Register by the chief Delta Bohemian himself, Billy Howell. He interviewed me for the purpose of reducing into layman’s terms what exactly is “Precision Farming.” I thought he did a good job […]

Chaos In The Classroom

By Huckleberry Ed (Clarksdale, Mississippi)  In Huckleberry Ed’s estimation, one of the most severe problems and hurdles to overcome in properly educating a child today in the Mississippi Delta and all over America has to do with utter chaos in the classroom and the home. Too many students live in houses void of silence, order, […]

Delta Strutters

By Dingus Batticus (Clarksdale, Mississippi)  Those of y’all who know about the Mississippi Delta probably know that the place is famous for blues music. That’s black folks’ music. You also probably know something about the plantation culture that the blues came from. Them is white folks’ plantations. As for me and my folks, we ain’t […]

Mississippi, Dixie Beer, Sweet Lucy, Ducks and Guns

The following submission for DINGUS BATTICUS’ column was a result of Lil John McKee’s recent duck hunting and beer swilling weekend with some college football teammates from over 30 years ago. Dingus shares a kindred spirit with his erudite agricultural icon–Lil John Mckee (Swamp Rat). Larry D–Larry Davis–one of the beer-swilling meatheads, wrote the following […]

Farming Haikus

(Clarksdale, Mississippi) By Lil John McKee This installment of Lil John’s Ag Corner (or whatever you homies want to call it) owes its origins to my favorite agricultural humorist, Mack Ray, a farmer near Marion Arkansas, who wrote several years for a national cotton magazine. Sadly, Mack is no longer entertaining the farming community with […]