STOP THE WORLD – Poor William is Overstimulated

Poor William Wants to Get Off: He is Rather Over-Stimulated!
By POOR WILLIAM
(Clarksdale, Mississippi) VIDEO and PHOTOS

What is he talking about now? Stop the world he wants to get off? Hey man, he can check out any time! This ain’ the Hotel California!

“Stop the world I want to get off” means I can’t keep up with all this damn technology. This old world is spinning way too damn fast for moi! I just want to do what James Taylor (JT) sang about—going up on that damn roof! 

Technology is comparable to what men of old would ask rhetorically about women. Now Libbers, understand this saying was always fondly spoken and if it gets your panties in a wad, then unwad ‘em or call us men the rat bastards that we most likely are:

“Women, what you gonna do with ‘em? Can’t live with ‘em and can’t live without ‘em!”

This meant that they loved women but they just couldn’t keep up with ‘em and they didn’t understand them, but they knew they needed them like a car needs fuel, and not just for loving, for civilizing too!

I reckon that’s where Poor William is regarding all this iPhone, iPad, Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, slambam-pass-the-jam, texting, emails with multiple accounts, phones ringing off the hook, messages left all over the place! BEEP BEEP BEEP!

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Damn, this over-stimulation is killin’ me, and I ain’ opposed to stimulation! But, I am over-stimulated just as sure as my bank account is overdrawn—both are metaphysical certitudes on any given day!

And, somebody—me included and guilty as charged by the one doing the charging—is always showing something on a mobile device that my eyes can’t follow.

Remember those chicks in the Austin Powers movie whose heads just heated up, smoked like a soldier on latrine duty and blew the hell off? That’s my head getting’ warmer by the hour!

That’s why I love a cotton field: ain’ nothin’ but the sounds of birds, a tractor humming in the distance, my trusty Viper shovel shearin’ pigweed roots off even with the sideburns, and occasionally my sayin’, “Damn that hurt!’

Then……one of two cell phones would ring in my pocket and I would have to stop, take my gloves off, get sweat all over the electronics and hence would come the ruination of my sense of peace and place!

Folks wonder why people love the Shack Up Inn and why white folks would build sharecropper shacks out in the middle of a field, when they “represented” oppression in days of old! Well, I’m a gonna tell ya why I think they do such a thing and why I go out to the fields sometimes as the sun is setting and drink a PBR! Ain’ no open container law in a row-crop field and if there is then it’s okay ‘cause this ain’ me anyway!

It’s because folks is the happiest when they ain’ got all this modern shit sucking the damn life out of what little life there is! It’s a short ride ladies and gentlemens! A short ride!

This constant beeping, buzzing, ringing, lights flashing in dark venues with blinding mobile devices and someone always talking on the damn phone with all their blue teefuses is killing our ability to move beyond a sound bite mentality and to actually engage relationally with folks with whom we are conversing!

Do ya really think we want to hear what should be private conversation in the grocery line, while providing retail service, while standing in line at the bank, while sitting at a restaurant table and sundry other places? HELLO? HELL NO, WE DON’T!

Now, the hypocritical one here is too often tempted to do the same as he has to answer calls all day for his work, but I sure miss the hell out of the days when all this didn’t eat up all my energy and cause me all this want-to-jump-off-the-world frustrations.

Relationships were better before the technological revolution, reflection was actually possible and nothing really improves without reflection, and our (me more than included) need for instant gratification was not gonna be met, which made us better people, I think.

E.M. Forester wrote in the epitaph of his famous novel, Howards End: “Only Connect!”

I don’t think he envisioned invisible electronic synapses hamstringing us in the name of connectivity! But that’s just one poor William’s opinion!

Sigh, it’s Sunday morning prior to Juke Joint Festival and nothing is ringing at present. Thank you Lord!

Cheers and remember: “There probably ain’ a sight as ugly as Poor William’s melon head smoking prior to spinning off his body de largesse. Let’s slow this caravan down and enjoy some living! pw

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